Yup, you read it right. From splash to splat — me, like a lizard that has fallen from the roof of a high-ceilinged room to the floor. Ouch!
Why, you ask, has this happened – you know, from splash to splat?
I started this blog yesterday with all the positivity and enthusiasm in the world and posted my first ever blog. Right? That was the easiest part, believe me.
Experts maintain that novice bloggers should make a habit of blogging every single day. Yes, every single day. They say that doing so not only forces them to keep writing, but also helps them by putting that writing out in the public eye right away.
When you’re reading that advice, it sounds so simple and so inspirational and oh-so-doable. Right? Wrong! Right after you post that virgin blog, doubts set in:
“What did I do? Have I lost my mind? Did I really commit myself to putting down a page of thoughts for public consumption, every single day? What was I thinking? I don’t even have thoughts on most days that are fit for my own private consumption, let alone for the eyes of the entire world! What if I wake up tomorrow and discover that all words have been squeezed out of me?”
These are, to mention, just a few doubts that will assail you. And then night approaches. You know how the dark distorts and magnifies every worry you have? Those mutated anxieties then advance upon you, intent upon trampling you.
You sit up abruptly in bed, feeling hot and cold all over. All you hear is the clock ticking away. (That Tinker Bell digital clock that had stopped working a few months ago, but you didn’t have the heart to throw away? Yeah, that one!) After sitting there, shivering, anywhere from a few minutes to a few hours, you’ll finally fall asleep, utterly exhausted. And lo and behold, before you know it, it’s the next morning.
Hey, wait a minute! I have just drafted my second post. And I didn’t even realize that I was doing it. And remember that lizard that you thought has belly-flopped to the ground? Turns out, it actually has landed on its cushioned, webbed feet. It is somewhat stunned, but it will live.
Okay, so I have grossly exaggerated, but seriously, this is the life of a writer, especially an aspiring one. Do published authors also feel this way? No idea! I have but one friend who answers to that description — note to self: ask her if she suffers from occasional self-doubts like I do, when I talk to her next.
In the meantime, is there anyone out there, who has published a book or two and would be willing to enlighten me and my friends here, on whether you suffer such self-doubts, too?
BUT, let me be the first one to tell you this: just as the lows are low, the highs of a writer’s life are really high. The euphoria you feel when you nail an especially difficult scene (and your critique group, which does not mince words, unanimously gushes over it) is just about worth all the lows that came before that one moment and all those that will surely come after it. Trust me on this one.